


Smoke Out

by pain_somnia



Series: One Big Family & Just Getting Bigger [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, please read the notes at the beginning of the fic, sasori should consider changing his locks, there is use of marijuana in this fic, yeah the characters are stoners don't come at me i made sasuke a stoner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:07:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23862766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pain_somnia/pseuds/pain_somnia
Summary: Sasori comes home ready for a day of relaxation, only to find his apartment overrun with a bunch of teenagers.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Sasori/Uchiha Obito
Series: One Big Family & Just Getting Bigger [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1531142
Comments: 4
Kudos: 60





	Smoke Out

**Author's Note:**

> hewwo!  
> here's another entry to the SasoObi/SasuSaku/Uchiha family series I have created mostly with my friend Kitty in mind.  
> In this one-shot of the series, Sasuke and his friends are teens. There's mentions of marijuana use and a line about mdma/ecstasy.
> 
> There's finally some actual SasuSaku in here other than the little bits of fluff from the other one-shots of the series because they're older in this one.

Sasori knew something was wrong before he dug his keys out of his cross-body bag. There was a familiar sweet yet acrid odor wafting from his apartment’s front door and pop-punk came muffled through the wood of the door.

Pop-punk? In  _ his _ apartment? Who the hell had the audacity━

It really shouldn’t have been a surprise when he opened the door that he found his boyfriend’s teenage cousin lounging on his wingback armchair. Sasori and Obito had been dating for seven years and he had practically watched Sasuke grow up and he always knew that the demon child would end up being a criminal one day.

“How the hell did you get into my apartment?”

Sasuke slowly blinked at him but then laid his head back down on top of Sakura’s head. Sakura was seated sideways on his lap, legs thrown over one of the arms of the chair. The two of them looked awfully cozy despite their claims that they weren’t dating. Sasori marched further into his apartment and around the plush sectional and huffed through his nose.

On the floor was Sasuke’s scruffy haired best friend that always had the distinct smell of wet dog. Kiba was lying face down, passed out by the looks of it. He followed the pale foot rubbing Kiba’s back up to it’s twiggy red headed owner who was lying on his sectional.

“Hey Sasori,” Karin murmured after she put her glasses back in place and was able to see him properly. Of the four of them she looked the most lucid, but he knew from experience dealing with Sasuke’s group of friends that Karin never seemed as inebriated as she actually was.

“ _ Hey Sasori _ ?” Sasori continued glaring at Sasuke. “You’re high in  _ my _ home and all you say is ‘hey Sasori?’”

“ _ I _ didn’t say hey.” Sasuke finally spoke up, shifting in his seat but keeping his arms wrapped around Sakura so that she wouldn’t slip out of his lap. “That was Karin. Are you sure  _ you’re _ not the high one?”

“Yeah!” Karin agreed, waving her arm around and unsuccessfully snapping her fingers.

“For fuck’s sake.” Ignoring the stoned out of their mind teens, Sasori shuffled into his kitchen and inspected the contents of his fridge and pantry. The fridge was full and Sasori pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed in frustration. They were the only teens he knew that instead of emptying out a fridge, filled it with groceries.

If Obito picked up groceries like he had planned there wasn’t going to be enough space in his fridge.

“Yeah, you had nothing so we got some snacks and stuff,” Karin answered with a grunt as she sat herself up. “I gotta check on Suigetsu and make sure he didn’t drown in the tub.”

Before Sasori could ask why one of their friends was using his bathtub, Sakura let out a really big yawn and stretched her arms over her head before settling back in the crook of Sasuke’s neck.

“We made you some stir-fry,” Sakura mumbled, half asleep.

“Let me get this straight.” Sasori grabbed a dish from the drying rack and headed over to the kitchen island where the food was laid out in serving dishes. “You broke into my apartment, bought me groceries, cooked dinner, and then got high.”

“Not exactly in that order,” Sasuke muttered, earning himself a gentle slap on the chest from the girl in his lap.

“You operated my stove while high?” Sasori looked behind him at his stove and narrowed his eyes at the sight on the counter space next to it. “And you used my decorative spice rack?”

“Decorative?” Sasuke scoffed. “Those are real spices and the  _ only _ spices in this place. I was surprised you even had any pots and pans.”

“I should call your parents.”

At that, Kiba shot straight up, eyes wide in fear. “You’re going to call my ma?”

Sasori was tempted to pull out his cell phone and do just that but even he wasn’t ballsy enough to call Tsume Inuzuka and tell her she caught his son with pot. Who knew if he would become a casualty of that.

“That depends.” Sasori crossed his arms in front of his chest and tapped his index finger on his upper arm. “Who made the stir-fry?”

* * *

Half an hour later Sasori was sitting on the floor on one of his cushions with his third helping of Sakura’s stir-fry— “I don’t cook,” Karin had groused, “I only eat thanks.” —completely at peace. If the group of teens were going to use his apartment as their little hideaway, they were going to share their stash with him.

“No one else is eating this, right?” Karin made herself comfortable, sitting cross legged on his sectional with the wok in her lap. Without waiting for an answer, she began to eat directly from the cookware.

Kiba wrinkled his nose in disgust at her actions. “Where does it all go? I think you might eat more than Chouji.”

“Shut up.” Karin sneered, shoveling more stir-fry into her mouth. “I’m hungry.”

“When aren’t you?” Sasori rolled his eyes but secured his hold on his bowl in case she decided she needed to eat his serving as well.

Usually Sasori didn’t smoke in large groups. At most he would with both Konan and Obito, but never more than that and especially never with teenagers that were almost half his age.

Sasuke’s friends were an interesting collective of people. Karin, who already ate twice her weight sober, seemed to become a bottomless pit when high. Then there was Kiba who apparently had no self control and had not only smoked more than everyone else, but had also taken a significant number of dabs which was why he was curled up on the floor sleeping.

But neither one was as unsettling as Sasuke himself. Sasori had watched him grow up since he was ten years old and knew that Sakura seemed to have a different set of rules in Sasuke’s book but nothing could have prepared him for how affectionate he was being.

“Yeah, it sickens us too.” Karin grimaced, nodding her head in the direction of the couple.

“You think that’s bad?” Suigetsu—who had finally left the tub and was now sitting on the floor in,  _ thankfully _ , his boxers—guffawed. “We went to a rave a few weeks ago and  _ someone _ —two someones—hit up our dear friend Molly and, well, I had to burn that sleeping bag.”

And with that Sasori almost lost his appetite. The news of their sexual encounter wasn’t shocking but it still was more information than he ever wanted to know. He didn’t want to ever know about Sasuke having a sex life until he provided Mikoto Uchiha with the gaggle of grandchildren she deserved. Grandchildren she deserved when she was older━when Sasuke was older.

No way in hell was he giving the boy the safe sex talk. That was not his responsibility.

“You all are way too comfortable with me. Need I remind you all that I’m an adult?”

Karin shrugged and flashed a sly grin. “You’re not like the other moms, Sasori. You’re a cool mom.”

Any references to pop culture were usually her cousin’s M.O. which finally brought to Sasori’s attention the lack of one hyperactive idiot and a chatty primadonna.

“Where are the blondes?”

“Cheer camp,” all of the teens save for Kiba chorused.

Sasori vaguely recalled Naruto, tearful and whining, clinging to his friends at the barbecue the Uchiha family had hosted for Independence Day. He had assumed that he would be stuck in summer school with the way he had been behaving and completely forgot that Naruto was their high school’s mascot.

“Naruto and Ino come back in two weeks,” Sakura explained without looking over at them. “Ino called me from a landline bitching about cell reception.”

That wasn’t surprising. Ino had a cell phone attached to her hand for as long as Sasori had known her—even when he first met her when she was ten years old—and she never went anywhere without it.

“Thank fuck,” Sasuke grumbled. Sakura giggled and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Naruto had the same issue but the counselors banned him from using the landline ‘cause he was always on it. Not even surprised it took him the first two days to lose phone privileges.”

“Well he was sneaking out to use the phone at like two in the morning.” Sakura’s smile slid off of her face and she scowled. “I’m kicking his ass when he gets home.”

Whatever weed she had in her system started to fade as she was reminded of Naruto and his shenanigans. Sakura started ranting about all of the annoying things the boy had done to irritate her while he was at camp over a hundred miles away.

“He forgot my cell number and called the landline—how does he remember that but not my cell!?—and woke up my parents and I had to explain to my mother where I was at three in the morning.”

Sasori narrowed his eyes at her, actually taking in the last bit of information she gave them. What was a sixteen year old doing out in the middle of the night?

“What were you doing out, huh?” Karin flashed Sakura a sly grin. “You didn’t visit  _ me _ in the early hours of the morning this summer.”

“Hey,” Sakura jabbed a finger in her direction, “this isn’t about that. We’re talking about how needy Naruto is.”

“Apparently he’s not the only  _ needy _ one,” Suigetsu guffawed.

Before Sakura could retort, Karin used one of the throw pillows to smack Suigetsu across the face. Sasori was about to kick them out when something familiar in Sasuke’s hand caught his attention.

“Want another hit?” He heard Sasuke murmur to Sakura, holding up a ceramic figure of a character from one of the shows Obito liked to watch.

Ignoring the fight their friends were currently having, Sakura batted her eyelashes at him and with a sweet smile asked, “Help me?”

Sasuke heated the bowl and inhaled from the head of the little green creature. Cupping Sakura’s face in his hands they shotgunned his smoke as he sealed their lips in a kiss. Sakura giggled, exhaling smoke all over Sasuke’s face.

That was one of—and the most important—reason why Sasori had a policy about not smoking in groups. There was a vulnerability exposed in the marijuana induced haze that he would never let others witness. Those moments were only for him and Obito as this moment should have only been for Sasuke and Sakura. He could always blame the pot for the smile, but Sasori knew the way he smiled was only for her. It reminded him of the way his own Uchiha smiled at him when they were curled up together in a world of their own.

_ Great, now I want him here _ , Sasori sighed inwardly. As if he summoned him, Obito banged open the apartment door and stormed in.  _ Huh. That was cool. _

Obito dumped the paper bags full of groceries on the counter and spun around to point a finger in accusation at his younger cousin. “You!”

_ Oh, this is about to get interesting. _ Sasori sat up straighter and watched as his boyfriend marched over to Sasuke, cheeks flushed red in frustration. It wasn’t a new look for him but it was one that was never directed at Sasuke before.

“Where is it? I  _ know _ you took it.” Obito snapped his fingers and wiggled his fingers, demanding his stolen property. “Where’s my Baby Yoda?”

_ Ah. _

And that’s why the little ceramic figure was so familiar. It was Obito’s current favorite character from one of his current favorite shows; a little gremlin creature that was much cuter than it had any right being.

“Oh,” Sasuke intoned without any emotion. “He’s my son now.”

“He’s  _ not _ your son. He’s  _ my  _ son,” Obito shouted, waving his arms around. “I made him with my own two hands!”

Sasori had a long day and he had no energy to tolerate an Uchiha fight. He stood up from his seat on the floor and snatched the Baby Yoda bowl from Sasuke’s hand.

“Hey!”

“Shut it,” Sasori muttered as he heated the bowl and took a deep pull. He tossed the bowl back and grabbed Obito by cupping his face in his hands and mimicked the way Sasuke had shotgunned Sakura.

Obito exhaled the smoke and flashed him a goofy grin. “Okay that makes things better.”

“Of course it does.” He took him by the hand and led him away to his bedroom. Sasori had had enough of all of the kids. They could stay until they sobered up, but he was done being in their presence.

All he wanted now was to spend time alone with his Obito.

Pulling Obito towards his bed, Sasori didn’t notice the lump lying under the blankets as he walked backwards. He sat down and instantly stood back up when he hit something hard.

“What the hell?” Sasori ripped his comforter off the bed, revealing a curled up sleeping, red headed boy. “Why is Gaara in my bed!?”

All he heard was the shuffling of feet and Suigetsu whining about his clothes before the door to his apartment slammed shut.


End file.
